New site policy: any reference to draw size scoring must have a trigger warning.
WEASELS TRY (TEA)POT FOR THE FIRST TIME. DETAILS OF LIFE-CHANGING EXPERIENCE TO FOLLOW.
5 Weasels attended Tempest, including 4 first timers. What began with Cheetos Chicken Fries ended with Brandon Fogel "Steve Harvey"-ing himself out of Best Austria. Your solo-throwing writer also brought home the rusty blade for, as Austria, causing a grown man England such emotional distress that he vowed to never play a tournament again. In actual results, Prime Weasel Bryan Shelden got 10th, Brian Pravel got 13th, Brandon Fogel got 14th, Jake Trotta got 16th, and Carlos Trevino came in 23rd. Tempest cooldown post coming whenever their brains recover. In the meantime, check out last week’s Weekly Weasel for updates. (Also, this.)
RED WEDNESDAY GOES FOR TWO "BECAUSE I COULDN’T GO FOR THREE"
We are at 18 (18!) for Red Wednesday tonight in Lincoln Square. If we get up to 19, we can make 3 boards. Otherwise, we’ll do 2 with a tremendous turnout. Sign up here.
SOON: THE MAKING OF MUSTELID MASTERS
Weasel Royale is this Sunday, where a new Bull Weasel will be crowned. Precisely one month later, the Bar Room Brawl Title Bout is at the Red Lion. For you kids at home, "mustelid" is the biological family that includes Weasel, Wolverines, Badgers, and most other Big Ten mascots. Except buckeyes, obviously, because no self-respecting mustelid would associate with hairless nuts. Yes, I made this joke to compensate for quoting Woody Hayes above.
THE WISE OLD WEASEL: GERMANY CONTINUES
We’ve had a great start to our Weasel Strategy Series. Expect this to return to the front page shortly. Players who were at Tempest plan to contribute, including some out of towners. In the meantime, add your own Kaiserly advice here.
SCARECROWS AND STYLE POINTS
New Guardsman and North Carolina Tarheel David Spanos is hosting on October 30 in the "Dip or Treat" game. Need one more. Feel free to wear a costume for the amusement of others. Should be as wild as David’s supports into Rumania (#neverforget). Sign up here.
FILLING OUT THE UNDERCARDS
We’ve got 4 for this Sunday’s undercard at Weasel Royale. We’ve got 1 for the Brawl Undercard on November 16th’s Red Wednesday. Sign up here.
Okay buddy, this is two "Weekly Weasels" in a row you haven’t paid your dues. Did you know every time you read this with unpaid dues, a puppy dies? I know you know that, because you read this far last time. Do you have something against adorable little puppies? Did Sarah McLachlin spite you somehow? Well, you need to let whatever dispute you have with Sarah go, and pay your dues. Don’t just do it for me, or the puppies. Do it for yourself. That’s right, right here.