Our Diplomacy league is the most active in North America. We average more than two league games per month in addition to Tournament play. We score all of our games using the Sum of Squares scoring system, and each player's best three scores count toward the season standings. We are known for our fierce competition, strong traditions, upstanding character and trustworthiness, and the propensity for Turkey to open to Armenia.
Times Turkey Opened to Armenia
THE WEEKLY WEASEL EMBRACES THE INEVITABLE
Oh hey folks. Been a while. How are things, what’s new? Let me just check the league standings real quick and…
BREAKING NEWS: FOGEL DOMINATES LEAGUE
This month’s bar game had a not-so-friendly reminder that diplomacy is a game where 7 players push blocks around a map of Europe for a few hours and in the end Brandon wins. Except this time it was by 75. Not a score of 75, his margin was 75. This vaults the Biggest Threat on Any Board to 198 points on the year, first in the league by a whopping 30 points. Game recaps incoming here.
Now, we have to give some credit where credit is due. Jim called the game a “batting practice fastball,” but herding cats for four hours is a damn tough job, even if they’re just kittens. Herding kittens to the highest non-solo score in league history is even more impressive. In fact, why don’t we make a list of all the impressive things BTOABrandon has accomplished this year:
Truly, Brandon is putting in one of the most dominant performances in league history, rivaling Matt Sundstrom’s “3 best country CODCON,” Yeargin’s 200 point 2011, and Nate Cockerill’s bar game solo. Hats off to Brandon- be sure to congratulate him in whatever you see fit.
TIGHT RACE FOR ROYALE HITS THE HOME STRETCH
Fogel has essentially locked up Weasel of the Year- 2nd place Jake Trotta would need to drop a 70 and is not scheduled to play again this season, 3rd place Mick Johnson would need a solo… and everyone else would need a solo AND another result.
BUT slots 4-10 are separated by a mere 10 points, with a handful of other players within striking distances. With two games to play scheduled, the race for those coveted last four spots in Royale is extraordinarily close: any lone board top by a contender will likely secure a seat at the Royale.
Meanwhile, the Brawl is a bit more compact, with Brian Shelden, Jim O’Kelly, and Matt Sundstrom vying for the 7th slot, currently held by Matt Sundstrom. Our last game of the series (and last game pre-Pyle) is scheduled for August 9, sign up here.
BEST RUSSIA RETURNS TO MIDWESTERN HANDS
After out-of-town dues paying Weasel Chris Martin held Best Russia for nearly the full season, Josh Heffernan hopped on his first board of the year and ran away with it. Check out the game recaps here.
Reigning Weasel of the Year Brandon Fogel knocked a batting-practice fastball out of the park earlier this month on Red Wednesday at the Red Lion in Lincoln Square to snatch the league lead from rival Jake Trotta. Fogel drew a Germany bordered by inexperienced players, and he teed off on them, posting the largest non-solo score in the club's Sum of Squares era, a whopping 82.571. With only two scheduled dates remaining--August 9 at the Red Lion and the Weasel Pyle on September 2--this ballgame appears to be over.
Played July 12, Game No. 345 ended by time limit after the Fall 1906 turn in the following center counts:
We played a hastily arranged game of Diplomacy yesterday at the Red Lion in honor of visiting Weasel ex-pat Peter Lokken. Sporting a Rambo-style headband, Lokken drew Austria and proceeded to organize his fellow Eastern hipsters into a formidable and efficient RAT triple alliance. Ultimately, though, the RAT tilted in favor of Josh Heffernan, who now owns the season's Best Russia.
Game No. 344 ended by time limit after the Fall 1908 turn in the following center counts:
Moot XI is in the books! Mike French, a traveling Weasel from St. Louis, took the title with a composite score of 114.876. Mike's tournament included a solo as Austria in Round 1, only the second Austrian solo in tournament history and 20th solo overall (only the ninth in tournaments that were not also World Diplomacy Championships). Mike's solo was especially remarkable in that it was accomplished with no fleets (believe your eyes by clicking here).
Finishing in second place was Eric Grinnell, who made a spirited charge in the final round, closing the gap to under 4 points with 1 year to play. Third place was taken by Alpha Weasel θ John Gramila (winner of Weasel Moot VIII).
June, the start of sundress/ wedding season, is fittingly named after the Roman goddess Juno. Juno was the goddess of marriage, but really, she was the goddess of jealousy. She’d stroll out of her Mount Olympus high rise, see all these nymphs (in the classical sense) in their sundresses holding hands with their boyfriends (or her husband Zeus/ Jupiter), and be filled with envy. That envy inspired her to turn people into cows, start wars, or send literal Furies after her enemies. Really, there are only two kinds of stories in Roman Mythology: ones where Juno aggressively seeks vengeance, and ones where she does not.
Passive Juno allowed the continent we push blocks around to be named after her husband’s slam piece.
Aggressive Juno orchestrated the fall of Troy.
You know what they say about Italians- they learn best from their mothers. This, Weasels, is where we share our wisdom.
THE WISE OLD WEASEL: ITALY
A disappointed, passive Juno surveying her four center Italy, about to be squeezed in 1908.
ALL ROADS LEAD TO ROME- YOUR ITALIAN OVERVIEW
Now like Juno, Italy doesn’t have to be constantly aggressive, but it must be jealous. Italy’s great challenge is getting stuck on 4 centers, home and Tunis, until the end of time. In fact, Italy only gets out of the gate, which our stats department defines as reaching 7 centers, in 33% of games, worst of the seven powers. But a strong Italy, with its variety of weapons and targets, brings havoc across Europe.
Italy is uniquely positioned between the theatres and at the edge of the stalemate line, if you count Tunis. Early game involves a fun variety of openings and establishment in one theatre, midgame requires a strategic maintenance of tempo and unit mix, the end game a vast kaleidoscope of solo possibilities.
THE SECTION WHERE WE PUBLICLY ASK FOR YOUR CONTRIBUTIONS, AT TIMES BY NAME
Drop a comment for how you best (or least best) play Italy. Brandon and Jim both had some solid results last year they could perhaps speak to. I find that Chris Kelly often does well on the boot, consistently hitting 7+ as the Italian. Perhaps Bull Weasel and Turkey superfan Matt “the Sundstrom” Sundstrom could share some thoughts on how Italy can best annoy Turkey, its biggest threat? Not to forget subprime Weasel John Gramila soloed with Italy at the 2016 WDC.
Hit the jump for stats department report on Italy, best club results, and Jake’s most recommended Italian articles.
Say hello to your dues-paying members for Season 12. It's not too late to join the list and earn a $5 discount for this weekend's Weasel Moot and eligibility for Season 12 awards. You can pay your dues--$25, $10 for students--right here. Dues pay for the website, our Meetup site, the annual club and Royale awards, and more. We appreciate your support!
If we've learned anything from 343 games of Windy City Weasels Diplomacy, it's that there is no honor among Weasels and that no good deed goes unpunished. Yet time and time again, those lessons must be relearned the hard way. Wednesday night at the Red Lion, it was the player who hosted the very first Weasels tilt nearly 12 years ago who flunked out of the club's School of Hard Knocks.
We managed seven years in Game No. 343, played at the Red Lion on Flag Day. The game ended by time limit in the following center counts.
This article is the closest thing we have to a Hall of Fame, or a Den of Records, to keep with the Weasel theme.